


Reaching the Finish Line

by MjrGenMatt



Category: Tom Clancy's Rainbow Six (Video Games)
Genre: Angst, Character Death, F/M, Family Drama, First shot at sad writing, Hurt/Comfort, Military, Sad with a Happy Ending?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-25
Updated: 2018-08-25
Packaged: 2019-07-02 13:34:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,246
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15797583
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MjrGenMatt/pseuds/MjrGenMatt
Summary: A routine mission against the White Masks turns to shit, leaving Rainbow Six one operator short when the day ends. Ryad is forced to pick up the pieces, and come to terms with all he, and everyone else, has lost.





	Reaching the Finish Line

**August 24 th, 2018  
22:37PM BST**

The sound of coffee being ground grated against his ears, melding with the constant buzzing of the ancient overhead light. If they didn’t fix that _Dios maldito_ thing soon he was going to smash it himself.

He walked to the break room sink and peered into the mirror above it. Eyes aged beyond their years stared back, enflamed veins spidering throughout his hazel infused stare. Bags under his eyes hung like stone weights, pulling on his optic nerves like they were trying to rip them from his skull. Even if his token insomnia wasn’t keeping his sleep schedule permanently _fucked_ , he wouldn’t be sleeping a bit tonight.

He pulled a metal chair from the table, legs scraping on the stone floor and further aggravating his headache. He screwed his eyes shut and pushed a groan through clenched teeth, today was surely one of the worst of his life.

He lifted the offending chair and slammed it on the floor. He angrily sat and put his elbows on the small table, hands clutching his face as if to keep his sanity contained within his pained brain. If he was being honest with himself, it wasn’t working. How would he get through the night?

The coffee maker dinged, breaking his dark stream of thought. He sighed deeply, smoothing his short hair and standing to seek some sort of comfort from the hot liquid. Spanish swears filled the air as a splash of coffee burned his skin, just one more goddamn thing to spite him.

Footsteps in the doorway gained his attention, and he looked to see Mike Baker leaning on the frame, somber expression written all over his face.

“You alright, mate?”

Ryad sipped his coffee, “If I’m being serious, no. But, I will survive. I have to. I cannot allow myself to be anything but ‘alright.’”

Mike hummed, electing not to pry on the topic. He walked over to the coffee machine and poured himself a cup.

The two men set at the table, silence thick in the air.

Ryad stared into his drink, mind wandering once again.

“How long did you know her?” Mike’s thick moustache ruffled as he spoke.

Ripples in the liquid bounced with rhythmic regularity, and Ryad began to count them in time with their appearance.

Ryad leaned back in his seat, eyes flicking to the ceiling, hands folding in his lap. “Since she was a teenager. We met in Madrid when she joined the police force.” His face brightened considerably, pride breaking through to the surface.

“She was the brightest of her class. Even as a child, she was the pinnacle of dedication. She told me the story of her upbringing, and how her father encouraged her to perform to the best of her abilities. Despite the lack of a mother, she was one of the most well-rounded individuals I ever met. She reminded me of… well, myself.”

Just like that, the fire in Ryad’s eyes was snuffed out, losing oxygen and dying, just like a part of him had today. He rubbed his chin with one hand, stubble lightly scratching his skin. This would be so much harder than he could’ve imagined.

His other hand found its way into his shirt pocket, pulling out the tags to stare at them again. He’d already memorized every etch, every detail. Ryad knew that this only served to torture himself, but he could not summon the _will_ to care.

Mike watched him with a knowing look, experience tell him exactly what Ryad was fighting with. Half-lidded eyes tracked his hand movements, ticking off the list of symptoms for guilt and anguish he’d performed himself too many times before.

“I know it doesn’t change anything, but I can relate what you’re goin’ through, lad. Had to bury too many before. Some young, full of life and potential. Some older, experienced, but no less lively.”

He paused, searching for a sign telling him to continue, or to shove it. Ryad’s eyes flicked in his direction, landing on the rubber stopper at the end of the table leg nearest Mike, so he took that as an allowance to keep recounting his story.

“There was one girl - real bitchy redhead, but hell, I still loved her. Mission was like any other, clearing out a building with a bunch’a hostages. We swept through, killed all the tangos, started moving the hostages out, she steps on a pressure plate linked to a chain of explosives.”

He took a deep breath, calming himself before continuing.

“The girl, Laura, knew it right away. Lights blinking everywhere, the whole place was fuckin’ red. She looks dead at me, mouths for me to come over. She tells me what’s goin’ on, and I go to radio for EOD. She stops me, points at a timer. Countin’ down from _three minutes._ ”

Ryad remained quiet, knowing where this was going.

“There was no time to wait, we weren’t expecting IEDs. I yell for the team to double time it, to get all the civvies out, and start losing it in front of her. Laura, the devil, pulls me to her, whispers that she loved me, wished we had more time, and kissed me. The kind with all the finality in the world. She knew it, I knew it. She pushes me away, tells me to run – to find something _else_ to live for.”

The emotion rolling off of the team leader’s body was the most Ryad had ever seen from the grizzled Brit.

“Well, you can imagine how that turned out. Point of my sob story, life goes on, Ryad. It’s alright to mourn, to remember, but you need to keep yourself on the level. Your team, your friends, your _family_ , still needs you. _I_ need you. Can’t afford to lose you, mate.”

Ryad still said nothing, soaking up all of what was just said to him. Mike inhaled shakily, memories still shackling his mind, and spoke.

“I need to go make a call.”

Ryad spoke so quickly that his commanding officer jumped, as if a spring-loaded trap had struck at him.

“No!” The word tore from his throat like it physically pained him, “…no. I should be the one to do it, señor. Please…”

Mike shifted his gaze to the floor for but a moment, before looking back to the Spaniard and nodding.

“Alright, Ryad. If you’re sure.”

“I am, Michael.”

He extended a hand to Mike. The SAS operative elected to take it and pull Ryad inward, hugging the man.

“We’re all here for you, lad. We’re a family here, don’t hesitate to lean on anyone. You’ll make it through to the other side. You’re strong enough to live on for both of ya.”

Mike turned to leave. Ryad called out to him, and he stopped momentarily in the door frame, looking over his shoulder.

“Thank you, Michael. For everything. I am lucky to have a friend such as you.”

“Any time. Good night, Ryad.”

“Buenos noches, Michael.”

With that, Ryad found himself alone in the room.

He let loose a shuddering sigh, every fiber of his being dreading the upcoming call he would be forced to make. Tears welled in his eyes, being blinked away just as quickly as they came.

He stepped into the hallway, sounds from his footfalls ringing off the walls like a church bell, tolling tirelessly into the night.

A second set of footsteps caught his attention in the doorway to his right, and Emmanuelle caught his gaze. She looked up at him with a defeated expression, her normally brilliant hazel eyes glazed over after the latest bout of tears. A black tank top and cargo pants covered her frame.

Without a word she moved forward and hugged Ryad tightly, her short hair brushing against his chin.

Both operators clung to the other, hoping to find some semblance of peace amongst the inner turmoil following the day’s mission.

“I am-“ Choked sobs broke her speech apart, “-so sorry, Ryad.” Emmanuelle swallowed hard, feelings of guilt forcing their way to the surface.

“If I had only been more careful, she’d-“

“Stop, do not do this to yourself, mi amiga. It is not your fault, it is no one’s fault.” Ryad shut his eyes so tightly that it hurt. “Elena would not want you to feel guilty-”

She broke from him as if he’d burned her and threw her arms out to her sides. Her face contorted in frustration, lips quivering.

“It should have been _me_ , Ryad! Michael told _me_ to clear the room, and I was not able to! _I_ got hit, and _she_ paid the price by saving me-” A sharp hiss was pushed through her teeth.

As she reset her feet, the bullet wound in her thigh flared with pain, causing Emmanuelle to stumble forward. Ryad caught and righted her, taking hold of her shoulders and grabbing her chin to force her to look at him.

“Emmanuelle, please, calm yourself! If not for you, then for me! You are injured, but I thank all I have that you are still here! I have already lost one friend today, I do not want to lose another!”

The pleading anger in his voice forced Emmanuelle to return to a less frayed state of mind, and she shook her head to clear the cloud of emotion surrounding her.

“I-I apologize, Ryad, I… I was being selfish. I did not think of what you were going through.”

Ryad looked at his hands, detaching them from her as he realized the vice grip-like hold he was using.

Emmanuelle sniffed, “If there’s anything I can do for you, Ryad, please do not hesitate to ask. I’m sure the rest of the team feels the same way. We are a family, and as one we must support each other.”

Through the emotional tension, Ryad managed a smile, “I appreciate it, mi amiga. I am truly lucky to have a family like this one.”

They shared a second embrace, devoid of hostility.

Ryad pulled away, “I have to call her loved ones.”

Her eyes flicked upwards once more, “Are you sure you want to do that alone? I could-“ He raised a hand.

“I am sure, I do not want to subject others to whatever may come. Plus, you need to rest. Do not make me carry you, _mademoiselle_.”

She chuckled lightly, but resumed the resting frown, “If you’re sure…”

“I am. Good night, Emma. Tomorrow will be a happier day, I promise.”

“Good night, Ryad.”

He placed a hand on her shoulder for but a moment, then turned to continue his walk. Emmanuelle stared at his back as he left, heart hurting for the man known as the Jackal, wishing him peace for the rest of the evening.

\---

Ryad pressed the first key on the video phone, steeling himself one last time.

Through the haze choking his consciousness he numbly pressed the remaining digits, his hand falling limply in his lap afterward. Hopefully it was her cousin who would answer-

“Tío Ryad! Buenos noches!”

A small child waved excitedly at the camera, toothy smile reaching from ear to ear.

Ryad’s eyes shot open, and he forced himself to stop the flow of tears. He cleared his throat awkwardly.

“Little Valeria, b-buenos noches! How have you been? Have you been behaving for your mama and papa?”

The small girl nodded fervently, “Uh huh! I’ve been really good! Hey tío Ryad, guess how old I’m gonna be next month!”

Ryad smiled sadly, praying to whoever would listen that his thinly veiled disguise would be enough to fool Valeria. He could not be the one to deliver the news to her; he was sure that he would break into pieces.

“Ahh, let me see…” He put a hand to his chin, adopting a thoughtful look, “will you be seven?”

The girl giggled, “No, silly! I am going to be eight!”

He chuckled, his chest rumbling with each breath of air.

“How could I forget? I must be slipping in my old age!”

He checked his watch.

“It is late, little one, you should be going to bed! Could you get your mother, por favor?”

She hummed in acceptance, running from the frame and calling for someone in another room.

Valeria was not his niece, but he’d become so close with Elena’s family since they met that he had taken to being a support figure in their lives. He had spent numerous holidays with Elena’s family over the years, and Valeria started calling him _uncle_ since she could speak.

A woman in her thirties entered the room, dark brown hair tied back and loose white sleeping shirt hanging from her shoulders. She adjusted her glasses and sat at the desk, looking up at the screen when she became situated.

“Ryad, this is unexpected! I hope you are well! To what do I owe the pleasure?”

He shifted in his seat, leaning forward to place his elbows on his knees, hands clasped in front of him.

“Unfortunately, Gabriela, there is no pleasure to be had today. I… wish I was calling for better reasons.”

Her brows pinched as she too leaned forward, mouth opening slightly as her mind raced.

“Did something happen, Ryad?”

He did not immediately answer, still unsure of how to say this without being too blunt.

“We went on a mission today, to a building taken over by the White Masks, those _bastardos_ … They sent twelve of us, including Elena. It was a mission like most, we did what we always do – stop people with twisted world views from hurting those that just want to _live_.”

He leaned back, finally looking at the camera.

“Michael and Sébastien led the groups. Elena and I were on opposite fire teams, and we entered at opposite ends of the building. Room by room, we cleared the threat. Hours passed, and the building was free from danger…” He smacked his lips, “or so we thought.”

Gabriela couldn’t take his silence anymore, “Ryad… Ryad what happened?” Her voice carried a tone of worry, bordering on panic; she was realizing just how this story could have ended.

He locked eyes with Gabriela, “Our two teams met on the second floor, and there was but one room yet unchecked. Michael told Emmanuelle to breach and clear the room, and Elena offered to cover her, as the rest of us secured the perimeter and did a munitions check. This room, some kind of fortified defense point - the walls were a thick concrete, and the _rats_ inside had deployed shielded signal jammers, so reconnaissance was not possible.”

“Why are you telling me all of this?!”

“…Emmanuelle was shot. Clean through her leg, the muscles were torn apart. The noise sent the teams into action, several of us running to investigate. Elena, she-“ He choked on his words. “She put herself into the line of fire to pull Emmanuelle to safety. The girl lives, thank the Maker, but Elena… she, too, was shot.”

Tears were streaking down Gabriela’s face as she screamed at the monitor, “Ryad you had better be playing some cruel joke! Elena, Elena where are you, you _serpiente_?!” She craned her neck and leaned every which way, searching the room for the missing person.

Ryad sternly spoke at the rapidly unraveling woman, “Gabriela! She… she did not survive her wounds. We were not able to save her-“

“ _Dios te maldiga_ , Ryad! You were supposed to protect her! You were supposed to make sure that she did not do something foolish! We told her that taking the role with Rainbow Six was dangerous, so much more so than anything in Madrid! _You_ convinced us otherwise, _you_ backed her up and said that nothing would happen to her so long as you were around! Now she is _dead_!” Her voice cracked upon uttering the final word.

He did not speak as she yelled at him; he knew this might happen. All he could hope for was that Gabriela would forgive him, eventually.

The sobs continued, neither person able to speak through the sadness blanketing the conversation.

“Did you- did you manage to talk to her before she…?”

“Si. She wanted me to tell you just how much you meant to her. How much she would miss seeing you and Sergio and Valeria… how much she loved you.”

“Was there anything else?” She caught herself before abruptly adding more, “I do not mean to sound harsh, amigo, I simply want to know.”

Ryad wiped a hand from his forehead down to his chin, as if trying to scrub the feelings he was experiencing from his body.

“She… told me that she loved having the chance to work with the world’s finest operators, and that she had no regrets for her choices.”

He chewed his cheek, contemplating his next words.

“She kissed me, Gabriela. She kissed me and I do not know what I should make of that. I do not know if I have been the world’s biggest _idiota_ for years, or if that was all she could manage to do to show her appreciation for everything in her final moments. Either way I-… I cannot help but feel as though I let her down. That I let my team down, that I let her family down. I simply do not know…I would have given _my life_ if it meant that she did not have to die.”

The dam holding back his emotions broke entirely.

“Ryad… Ryad, please – please speak to me.”

He raised his eyes to look at her, his face showing every sign of lost hope.

“Despite what I said earlier, I do not blame you for this. I know you did not mean for this to happen, that you would have done anything to replace her in that situation, that you cared for each other very much. Do not beat yourself up over this, amigo. No matter how much you feel as though it was on you, do _not_ lose yourself to guilt. This family lost someone today, but so did _yours_. We, and they, need you to carry on, to keep going. Elena would want you to keep living, even if she could not join you on the journey.”

Ryad forced a ghost of a smile, “You remind me of Michael and Emma… and, well, me.”

“There’s a reason for that, you know.” She examined his face.

“Try to get some sleep tonight, Ryad. We will talk more tomorrow. You look like you need it more than anyone. I-“ Her breath hitched, “I will find a way to tell la familia. I do not know how, but I will. Sleep, amigo. Take solace in the company of your family, and sleep.”

“I… I will try. Adios, Gabriela, buenos noches.”

“Buenos noches, Ryad.”

The screen went dark, and Ryad found himself alone once more. Alone with his thoughts, chanting at him and scratching against his brain, clawing at his feeling of guilt-

No. He would _not_ let this happen to him.

_Michael_ was right.

_Emma_ was right.

_Gabriela_ was right.

He was still alive. Still needed. Still _loved_.

Heaving a heavy sigh, Ryad stood from the chair and moved to leave the room to spend time with his brothers and sisters in arms.

Elena’s journey have been ended, but he was still determined to live on – for her, and for himself. Whatever it took, he would continue to be there for his family. _Both_ of them.

**Author's Note:**

> And -SCENE-
> 
> This was actually pretty enjoyable to write, even if I hated doing what I did to Ryad. I've been told I was pretty alright at writing happy stories, and then I wanted to see how I could do at something more dark. Let me know how I did, and thanks for reading, everyone!


End file.
